Not the Last Call

God often asks hard things of us.

things that make us uncomfortable.

Not occasionally… not selectively… but consistently, throughout the entire story of Scripture and even throughout our own lives.

There are moments that stretch us… and then there are moments that feel like they’re breaking us.

This feels like one of those for me.

I woke early this morning… before they come to begin preparing me for surgery. I wanted to read my bible.

I needed peace,

Needed comfort,

Needed encouragement.

And I started thinking about the people in the Bible.

Not the polished versions we talk about… but the real ones.

Moses… “Who am I?”

Jonah… ran the other direction.

Jeremiah… “I’m too young.”

Gideon… hiding in a winepress.

These weren’t fearless men stepping forward with confidence.

They hesitated. They resisted. They questioned.

They felt exactly like I feel right now…

This is too much.

And maybe that’s the part we don’t say out loud often enough. We don’t admit.

Faith doesn’t eliminate those feelings. Feeling of inadequacy.

It walks us straight through it.

…

There’s this idea we carry… that we have limits. That we can only handle so much. That once we reach that line… we’re done.

But I believe people were created to push beyond our limits…

And I’ve started to wonder…

What if that’s where something else begins?

Something more powerful?

What if our “limit” is just the end of what we can do …on our own…

and the beginning of what God can do through us?

Strength doesn’t show up when everything is easy.

It shows up during the hardest times.

We don’t grow in comfort.

We grow during discomfort … in times of pressure… in moments that feel unfair and unwanted.

The very things we would never choose…

are often the things that shape us the most.

…

I haven’t been asking “Why?”

Not this time.

Because deep down… I think I already know.

Not every detail…

not every outcome…

but the purpose

behind the pressure.

He wants to use it.

He wants to use me.

Not because I’m the strongest… but because I’m willing.

Or at least… willing enough to keep stepping forward even when I don’t feel strong.

A week ago…

life felt normal.

Predictable.

Planned.

And now…

everything feels different.

Uncertain.

Heavy.

And honestly… uncomfortable in ways I didn’t see coming.

Maybe that’s exactly where this was always headed.

Not toward ease…

but toward purpose.

…

Because God doesn’t call the qualified.

He qualifies the called.

And sometimes that process looks like refinement…

and sometimes it looks like fire.

Not to destroy…

but to reveal.

To strip away what we thought we needed…

so we can finally see what we actually have.

Or better yet…

‘Who’ we actually have.

…

So I’m being asked to walk through something hard…

something I wouldn’t have chosen…

something that feels beyond me…

My response isn’t to resist it.

My answer is to trust it.

To step into it… not because I understand it…

but because I trust the One who does.

…

And if you’re in that place too…

feeling stretched… overwhelmed… maybe even quietly saying “this is too much”…

Like I’m feeling this morning …

you’re not alone.

You’re not failing.

You might be right where you’re supposed to be.

Right at that edge…

where your strength ends…

and something greater begins.

…

So here’s the question I’m asking myself right now… surrounded by darkness in my hospital room…

maybe it’s one worth asking together…

If the hard things are what shape us…

what if this moment… this exact one…

isn’t here to break us…

but to build something in us we never could have reached any other way?

Thank you to all my prayer warriors. You guys are amazing. You give me strength! Love you all. I’m confident this isn’t the end…just the intermission…

So get your popcorn and hurry back to your seats… because the show is about to get really good! ❤️🙏🏻